It started with, of all things, cat litter.
We have two cats. We love them very much. Missy and I have been married for 12 years as of Sunday. The cats have been in my life since before she was. They’re an enduring part of our relationship.
It is, and has been, largely my job to be the one who cleans their litter. Sometimes I’m really diligent about it, and sometimes, well not so much.
And I felt bad about that.
I told Missy, and she spanked me really hard for not doing it. But then we got talking about the whole interaction.
Together, we decided to try an experiment. We would practice a sort of mindful power exchange.
How would it work? It wasn’t super complicated. We decided together that at home I would be diapered a whole lot more, and that I had chores to do every day. (Really it was just the cat litter. We started simply.)
After a few weeks of that, things sort of organically morphed. Missy, or as I like to call her, Mama, became more or less in charge of my time at home. That means that when I’m home I do what she wants. If I want to work on my side project and spend a few hours coding it, I ask her.
Sometimes she says no, because she wants us to watch a movie together, or to go to bed early for cuddling. Sometimes she needs me to give her a massage or rub her feet.
The thing, the very big thing that has changed between us, is a frank and open understanding between us that I am in service to her and that that is what she wants. That means that I put her needs first, ALWAYS.
Is this a sex thing? Sorta. And sorta not at all. This subtle change is profound, pervasive and deep. Yes, it includes sexual things. But it’s not ABOUT them.
I’m blissfully, delightfully and completely in service to her. I’m her property.
This change, it has changed our lives. I think I’m the happiest I have ever been in my whole life
I love her more than words can say.
