#gratitudeNow: This VR thing is working out

So for my birthday last month, I got an awesome present, an Oculus Quest 2 VR headset. It’s amazing, and I’m quite taken with it.

Besides being fun, it’s actually a dorky way to get some exercise in, too.

I’ve started this morning routine, where I spend about 35-45 minutes doing two fitness games.

The first is called Beat Saber. You use these glowing light sabers to hack and slash little block in time to music, while you duck and dodge obstacles. It’s hard, and I love it!

(Yeah, Mission 4A is kicking my ass. I’ll get it eventually!)

The second one, Echo VR I love even more. It’s a zero gravity e-sport. You are in this robot body that has thrusters in the wrists, and a main propulsion unit on the back. It’s very Iron Man like. You can float, flip, and glide through this sort of space station which has an arena in it. In the arena, you play a sort of soccer-like game chasing a disc (think TRON) around, and trying to throw it in the other team’s goal. (Each team has three players.).

So far, I mostly play it with AI teammates against AI opponents. But I’d love to get together with some friends to play it regularly. I’ve also found I’m something of a bruiser. I enjoy floating up to my opponents, grabbing onto them and punching them in the head.

This morning, that behavior, plus a sudden quick save throw got me a win!

It’s fun, but it’s also really exercise, that I look forward to doing.

And it’s totally working. I’m losing weight, actively look forward to my time in virtual space each morning, and seeking out the exercise. Yay!

#gratitudeNow: Face time together

That’s my brother Spacey.
I love him.

We aren’t biologically brothers. We are family by choice. And have been for decades.

We talk every week, often by phone, many times by video call. We see each other in person as often as we can, which is never enough for either of us.

We are just there for each other in our lives. Our relationship is one of the most enduring and important ones in my life.

We celebrate each other’s victories, help one another plan and sound out things, act as willing and enthusiastic navigators for each other, and soothe each other’s pains.

One of the amazing things about our long relationship is that we have developed patterns, rituals, and a sort of private history.

In this artsy filtered picture of my brother you can see one of them. He loves to FaceTime with me while he holds his phone and walks around his house. He’ll do these conversational laps as we dig into something. Or I’ll just be present with him as he moves about his day, cooking a meal, doing a chore, or even going to the bathroom.

Yes, we listen to each other pee.

And that’s super intimate. But maybe not in the way you’re thinking. We just open to one another, and lay bare the contents of our innermost thoughts and feelings. We don’t have secrets or shame.

Compared to that, the sound of some urine hitting water is no big deal.

I’m grateful for my brother every single day. He’s a remarkable person, and my life is an order of magnitude better for his having been and continuing to be in it.

#gratitudeNow: Peanut Rescue

So Missy and I had a plan to go see Kevin and Kacie and their kiddos for Valentine’s Day. However, a nefarious circumstance put the trip in jeopardy. Kevin came down with the flu! (Boo.)

But Peanut and Chris who live not too far away, stepped up and came to the rescue, offering to host us for the weekend. (Yay!)

This is wonderful, because the whole lot of them are among our most favorite people, and we haven’t seen them in ages.

I’m so grateful for the chance to reconnect and spend time with people I care for so much. I just wish Kevin felt better. It’s frustrating knowing he’s so close by but sadly out of reach. :-( I guess that just means we have to come back more.

#gratitudeNow: A Dying Industry

Everyone and everything dies.

Cheery, huh? Actually, it is. Stick with me on this one, folks.

Endings and death have been on my mind a whole lot lately.

First off, two days from now will be the one year anniversary of Andrea’s passing.

Secondly, about two months ago, Squee and I broke up, after about four years together. It’s okay, really. I still love and care about her. But things change.

Third, my new job is demanding, and causing me in many ways to re-evaluate myself as a person, in all sorts of ways. I go to bed early, get up early to drive a long way to do a job I’m sort of teaching myself to do as I do it. It can be exhausting.

Last night I came home from work fully intending to work on my side business, do some podcast related work, and attend to a nagging bill related chore too. Instead I sat on the couch, lost at Overwatch for about 2 hours, and put myself to bed early, feeling low of spirit.

This morning though, I feel great. I had plans to get out the door by 6:15, an hour ago. But those plans died on the vine as I realized some other things I had to do. I made breakfast, packed my lunch, changed the cat litter, and realized I don’t have to push myself to do everything and anything all at once.

This is something Andrea knew and knew well. Don’t mistake me, she wasn’t some sanctified guru who floated an inch off the ground, and whom nothing ever bothered. So many of the phone calls and visits we had with one another started off with one of us engaging in a good old fashioned bitching session about something.

But the thing she knew, and which I also know but keep forgetting which is also, by the way perfectly human, is that everything and everyone dies. Every moment dies. Every plan dies. And when they do, they leave the ground where I’m standing fertile and ready to receive this very next moment.

Take this morning. As I made my breakfast, and checked my watch, I thought I might have enough time to change the cat litter this morning. When I went to check it, it was in a terrible state (Sorry kitties!) and I knew that I had to change it. So I did. If that means my commute will bloom up to 90 minutes today (which is very likely), well so be it. That’s okay. I will witness the death of the old plan and welcome the new one.

I know that because of my abandonment issues I have a tendency to want things to last. When I see that long arc of persistence grow around me, I lean into it and get comfort from it. It’s not an entirely bad thing either. It’s immature to divide the world into simple, absolute binaries. Yin contains Yang, and vice versa.

No matter how much energy I pour into anyone or anything in my life, it will eventually die. That’s tragic, yes. But it’s also comforting. Love and pleasure come to a fold, yes. But so does pain and suffering. That’s why it’s so import to just keep swimming, like Andrea always used to say.

The fact that the swim ends is what gives it beauty.

#gratitudeNow: Ring in those good habits

As I write this, i’m getting ready to go to the gym to go swimming. For Christmas this year Missy got me an Apple Watch. I’ve been using one of its applications, that tracks movement, standing, and exercise as rings.

Each day the rings start out empty and you fill them as you go. Workouts are an implicit thing, You tell the watch what you’re about to do and it tracks it with extra detail.

This really works for me. For one thing, the data gets shared with another application I use, Lose It. It makes it so easy to really see the benefit and interrelated nature of my choices. It’s also a sort of gamification of being healthy. I know that the swim I do a few days ago can allow me to eat an ice cream sandwich a few days later. Or conversely, see how I feel and how my weight fluctuates based on the amount of exercise I get. It makes me able to stand back a few feet from individual choices and see how they knit together.

All of which combined, help me be more fully present in both what I’m doing and why I’m doing it. I’m really excited to grab a quick shower, get dressed, & get to my gym. I like those closed green rings. I like what they do to and for me.