I'm on a train heading up to visit family in New York.  With four hours or so on the train, one of the things I've had the time to do is some "digital housekeeping."  I took some stuff off my main page, because I'm not doing life coaching anymore.  (It's not that I don't enjoy it, but I've got limited time and resources, and have to focus on what I'm up to now.)

Plus. I reorganized the fiction that's already there, and made room to add more.

Because there's going to be lots more.

I'm grateful for the time, and the space to show off what I've been up to.

See for yourself.

AuthorMako Allen

For a while now I’ve been contemplating my relationships to other people.  It’s both a deep and wide sort of thing to explore. Who do I connect with? How does that connection occur, and evolve? Why do I make a connection? What does such a connection mean? 

I don’t have any ready pithy answers for you. My connections to others are varied in a myriad of ways.

They do all have one thing in common: me. 

There’s a Lao-tzu quote I’m rather fond of which is front and center in this particular contemplation: 

“Mastering other’s is strength, mastering yourself is true power.”  (Pictures a man in a tug of war between brain and heart, being ripped in two)

“Mastering other’s is strength, mastering yourself is true power.”  (Pictures a man in a tug of war between brain and heart, being ripped in two)

It is damn hard to understand what you feel and why you feel it.   I’m often very tough on myself in any number of ways, including relationships.  

I often stumble into a binary of being in the right or wrong in my relationships. Am I being a good partner, husband, friend, employee, business owner?

But it’s not that simple. And part of that is that I have to consider myself.  

That can be challenging. Plus, ultimately, I have to do that considering by myself.  It comes from me, and it’s for me.

There’s this particular scene in The Matrix that speaks to this process and its value.

Today that scene is very much on my mind. The way the Oracle describes Neo’s knowing he’s the One is a kind of mindfulness. She says it’s like being in love.  


I know my love for others from experience of it .  That means I know what it’s like to love vs to be in love. They’re very different things.  And it means that when it comes to relationships, there aren’t any hard and fast rules, no black and white hats.

That’s a very helpful thing to realize. 

Compassion for the self is challenging but worthwhile.  

AuthorMako Allen

So, I've been writing new erotica for a few months now, over at my patreon,  It's exciting stuff.  I have a lot of control and freedom there, to experiment and to innovate.

I write stories, and record audio of them too.

But, I have help.  Part of those innovations I'm talking about is working with a female narrator, my friend Suzie Jenkins.

And another is working with a brilliant illustrator, Jenn Solo.  She's amazing.  The way she illustrates my stories is  a sort of smutty, erudite New Yorker Cartoon style.

Take a look.

She's so great.  I'm thrilled to have her as a creative partner.


AuthorMako Allen

I’ve been friends with Andrea for over a decade.  If you listen to the podcast, you’ve heard her. (She’s on a number of them including my all time favorite episode, number nine.)

Andrea and I have this wonderful thing we do for one another.  We are sort of philosophical sounding boards for each other.

She lives far away, in Michigan, and we don’t see one another very often. But here’s how this process goes down. We won’t talk for months, sometimes even years, and then out of the blue, reach for one another again. Sometimes I initiate that, sometimes she does.

Then, when we talk, all the time and distance just fall away. And, weirdly, we each find that whatever it is that’s front and center in our life or mind, whatever thing it is that we are working on, the other person has something wise to say about it, or has just been going through it themselves.

Which is also why we are tremendously good at calling each other on our own negative habits. We will say to each other, “so, how’s that working for you?”  This is always followed by the person asked laughing (a little bitterly) and feeling grateful. 

My breakfast is on the left.  

My breakfast is on the left.  

Yesterday was one of those times. Even though I was here in Virginia, and she was in Michigan, we had breakfast together. 

We laughed together, ate eggs together, and caught up.  I’m so grateful for my friendship with Andrea. I love her very much.  

AuthorMako Allen