Whew, what a morning.
So I got out the door later than I wanted, and thought to myself, "all right, it's too late for the gym, but I can ride the express lanes and get to work early, and that'll work out just fine."
Not so much.
First, traffic was INSANE. So much so that the variable toll lanes were really expensive. I saw tolls for $14, $15, and then $15. I ended up paying somewhere between $35 - $55.
Yes, really.
To add insult to injury, something went really bad on the trip, some accident I didn't see, or major police thing. My normally 35 minute commute (when I do it after 9), turned into a 90 minute one.
Ugh.
However, I got to have this really nice long call with Squee. She totally got me laughing, and aware that I had options for how I felt, and that I could be present, stay. I didn't have to spend the ride feeling angry, or sorry for myself, or any of that silly crap.
So, I resolved not to dwell on it. Then, when I finally did get to my office, I bopped on down to the deli and picked myself up a nice cup of fancy coffee, and a bagel with lox. So good.
And, the whole experience taught me something. It's really okay to use my time the way I feel I should. That means waking up at 5, hopping (or stepping carefully, because safety) out of bed, going downstairs, spending an hour working on my side-project, then getting out of my night-time diaper, grabbing a shower (slippery little buggers), and heading for the gym to walk, run, or swim.
THEN I can get on my way to work, and get there AFTER nine. That's not only okay, it's SENSIBLE, and mindful.
Best $50 I have spent recently.