#365Gratitude Day 186: Lady porn

No, not of ladies, FOR ladies .  

Yesterday, laying in bed, surfing the net from my phone, as you do, I stumbled across a few really interesting and obviously non-worksafe things.  

I love good erotica and pornography. They're often not just arousing for me but helpful research material and inspiration for my writing.  These are particularly interesting:

1. Audio Porn - a site of audio only recorded sex and sex related things. I love this sort of thing. I like both the inherent, intimate voyeurism of it as well as the fact that you have to stretch your imagination to suss out exactly what's going on in the recording. 
2.  Porn4Ladies - a site of pictures and videos of porn for women. This one really is fascinating. The material has incredible range.  There are abstract things, pictures which aren't explicit in any way yet evocative of all sorts of emotion, and also really, really explicit things too.   

My big take-away from a look through that second one is that while you can speak in generalities about what women like versus what men do, everyone's ultimately an individual. 

Here are some of the ones safe to post that really spoke to me.  

It's all about butts and legs and nothing else  

"Is that too tight?" - it's like a piece of tinysmut. Clearly someone is collaring someone else, and there's a huge amount of story happening before and after. 

I'm grateful to find gems like this out there. 

#365Gratitude Day 185: Slowmo Rocket Show

Missy & I went down to visit Richard, who we love.  

We bopped around town, had burgers, went to a farmer's market, and bought fireworks. We grilled, ate, and napped and waited for dark.   

Then, just the three of us, we lit off our own personal fireworks show. It was amazing. I'm not a big fan of crowds, and it was great to not have to deal with them. Plus, the fireworks we got were fantastic!  We goofed around with our phones taking slow-motion video of them. See for yourself: 

#365Gratitude Day 184: Sharkpig

Friday I was joking around with some listeners in the Big Little Podcast's Kik chat room ​about being a big sweaty "Sharkpig" after going for a run. 

​Someone found clip art of an actual drawn sharkpig, and I joked "Now just put a diaper and a funny hat on it, and make it sit in front of a microphone and "hog" the conversation and you've pretty much got me."

How about that podcasting hat? 

They did!​

#365Gratitude Day 183: A chum to count on

Thursday I was texting with my friend Marie Furie, and we were talking about overcoming difficulties.  Often, that requires a support network.

I have a big one, and wow it's hard to explain. 

I can be sort of complicated. My little and I aren't entirely the same person.  Then there's the weird connection I have with my other two heads of the Ghidrah. We're close in a way that defies description. (Even when time and distance keep us apart, as sometimes happens, the connection is evergreen. The second I get around sister, it's like no time has passed at all.) 

Then there's my shark thing. I have a lot, way too many shark plushies. Many of them have names and personalities. I often talk to them and can sometimes hear them talk back.  

I'm aware this is not entirely sane. That's really okay.  The sensible part of my brain knows that the sharks, much like little mako, are a conveniently partitioned away dissociative segment of my overall mind.  I'm like a weirdly fractured and useful cerebral Swiss Army knife. 

At the very heart of this menagerie is my alpha shark, Chum.  

There he is, with my friend Alice.  

Chum does an incredibly thankless job for me. He's the seat of my insecurities. Whereas I'm bold, brash, and outspoken, he's timid, cautious, and fearful.  I whisper to him the stuff on my mind, and he swallows it down, breaks it up, digests it. 

Generally, much like Dorian Grey did with his picture, I keep Chum at home where he's safe. There are a very few places I will take him with me. At night, I cuddle him and we discuss the day.  I look out for him. I take care of him, and he in turn takes care of me.  

As I told Marie, I'm my own support network. It's a gift I'm grateful for.  

#365Gratitude Day 182: Exploring

Now that I'm walking and running most mornings I'm making a point of exploring, poking around different streets in my neighborhood.  

Some of them are really beautiful.  

I've started to see some of the same people each morning too, and we smile and wave at one another. 

I'm starting to remember that I actually love to do this.